Three Reasons I Don't Miss Being a Christian Rapper

Disclaimer*
This is coming from someone who will likely never perform in a church again (maybe never perform anywhere ever) so take everything I am about to say with a grain of salt.

As I sit back in my dingy office, listening to Sleeping at Last, looking at the picture of Cross Movement that has been floating about Facebook, I can’t help but think how that image is pretty much the Avatar of a period I reflect on with fond memories but have no desire to ever go back to.

This article, blog, whatever, isn’t about my good memories then, I don’t think there is anybody out there who could actually be bothered to care. I’m writing this because even though I’m not a Christian rapper anymore, I still care about the community.

I joined the community when it was in its infancy. Before I started going to church, I used to rap secular at school and had never heard of Christian rap, at least locally, so when we formed Lil G’s, we thought we were the first. Our world opened up when we met Four Point Mission and found out they had been active for about a year.

For someone with only recent knowledge about local Christian Hip Hop, those names will sound like Chinese to you, (Unless you actually are Chinese in which case they’ll sound like Oshiwambo—unless you own a Chinashop in Oshikango?) and I wouldn’t blame you. Both those groups died out years ago. From the two groups, only one surviving member is still active in rap (Ink).

Both groups, including Radikal Soulz and MDG are part of what I consider the richest part of the history of Namibian Gospel Hip Hop (perhaps that is just nostalgia speaking), but here is why, while I look back to those days with fond memories, have no intentions of ever going back.

1.    The church exploits its artist. Whether knowing or unknowing, that is beside the point, but for the longest time, the church has treated strangely a component that has been so key to its wide reach among the youth. In my nine years as an active Christian rapper, I have been paid no more than thrice for a performance by the church, the rest have been by secular organisers. One gospel show organiser even wanted the performers to pay—and when we said we had no money, took pride in paying for us! Look, the music industry in Namibia is already tiny, Gospel microscopic, but to expect an artist to thrive simply because they’re Christian is downright moronic. When we had an upcoming show, we had two options to get to the venue. Either walk there or use our own money for transport. I look back now on a great night of rapping to a beautiful audience—after which the pastor in his expensive suit would come out and tell us how powerful our performance was before getting into his nice car while we scrambled for taxi money to go home—with nothing but resentment. But the crazy part is, this crap still happens. The saddest part about it is, rappers will continue to put up with this because they believe it is their service to God. Whether or not it is, is not my focus here. Most local churches, particularly the “born again” Pentecostal make enough to keep the pastor on a doctor’s salary. The truth is, their show organisers just don’t understand how much an artist puts into producing music, all to have to perform their songs for free. How the hell do you expect them to pay for their next studio session? It’s not by the laying of hands, I can tell you that. Pay your bloody artist!! And if you’re a church that has a studio and think you’re slick because you won’t pay your artist since you give them free recording, you’re still exploiting them. Gospel shows although many of them are free make enough from offerings and food sold at the event to afford a small fee for the artist. I could say much more on this topic, but I will simply leave it on this note, you don’t know how much even N$150 means to an up and coming performer. Let them go buy a nice gift for their mother on Mother’s day. That is a lot more satisfying than JUST the feeling that you served the Lord, because if that was sufficient, then your pastor would still be in Nigeria/Zambia, praising the Lord and eating agege bread and not ordering pizza in Pioonerspark.

2.    No sense of excellence.

On top of not being paid, there is nothing more frustrating than going to a show and looking like a fool because the mics make you sound like Chewbacca from Star Wars getting a Colonoscopy?. It’s annoying. Now I will say this…this is completely alright if the show is in Babylon for a bunch of orphans after feeding them and just having a good time with them. But at an annual Convention under the theme, “2016 is the Year of Prosperous Jubilation for the Saints”? Are your mics sinners?? Why do they make people sound like the Beast of Revelations having an abortion? The truth is churches want it the easy way…’The kids of today, they like the Hip Hop, right? Let’s get young Jonny from the choir to do some songs at the next convention.’ Well, maybe also buy a mixer and amplifier so young Jonny can retain some semblance of dignity afterwards. It’s not just the sound too. Gospel shows are riddled with blunders which stem from poor organisation and planning. An artist who was informed he would go first gets reshuffled because some big artist who just stepped in has to go on now because he has to go finish off some affairs at home. Event hosts are picked at random, making for some of the worst chemistry and jokes you’ll ever hear. Let me also not forget about whoever decide to put on the wannabe Hillsong band before the crunk Hip Hop song so now you have to rap to a bunch of weeping teenagers. Ok, I will admit, some of this is probably nit-picking, but you will very rarely go a local gospel show and use the words elegant. Just because you think you’re doing it for the Lord doesn’t mean that’s all that matters. Strife for some semblance of excellence at least.

3.    Gospel shows create a bad atmosphere for non-Christians.

I can imagine having to invite your non-Christian friend to a gospel album release show and then having that event hijacked by the pastor of the church who decided that was the perfect time to lecture all the young kids about sex because he caught his daughter canoodling a boy the other day…So here’s your sexually active friend who you’ve been trying to get inside the church for the last four months and you promised was coming to listen to some great underrated music, having to listen to how boyfriends are evil…oh, and there’s a thirty minute worship session afterwards all of a sudden, and an alter call. That happens a lot. Look, I get that people want to be open to the Lord’s directions and that’s cool, but don’t call it an album release then. I don’t do it anymore but I’m pretty sure not everyone’s evangelism strategy is to condemn anything within a 100 meter radius. I’ve had to apologise to people for inviting them to a Christian show and them being made to leave feeling like filth. That is not cool.

Now as I said in the disclaimer, this is all coming from someone who has zero interest in ever being a Christian rapper again, but for my friends still involved, both as organisers and musicians, please take things into consideration.